Citrus
by looney4rooney
Summary: The world in the eyes of Dan. He's infatuated with Serena. He watches her every day as she sits on the steps eating citrus flavored yogurt. Citrus can be sweet like the love for a girl, yet it can be tart at the realization that that girl is unattainable.
1. Daniel Is Such A Stupid Name

**----**

**Citrus**

**----**

Dan Humphrey hates to be called **Daniel**. It's so disgustingly formal. And it simply makes him think of a boy wearing a ridiculous tie and a preppy sweater, which just so happens to be a version of him as he **is** forced to go to **such** a pretentious school as St. Jude's School For Boys. At least he's able to stick it to the man a little by wearing his shirts wrinkled, his ties loose, his pants worn and baggy, shoes scuffed with shoelaces untied.

And you know what sucks even worse than wearing shitty school uniforms, being called Daniel by your perverted gay closeted male professors who wink at you, and having to go to a school with **a** bunch of rich dumbass boys who don't give a fuck about getting an education? You know what just fucking blows? The fact that he must be hopelessly in love with Serena van der Woodsen.

She's so goddamn beautiful he forgets to exhale his smoke as he sits outside watching her perfect form perched on the front steps of Constance Billiard eating citrus flavored yogurts with her not as even equally gorgeous friends.

And then he looks like a damn fool as he turns bright red and wheezes. It's not as if he's never smoked before which is probably what most of the guys who snicker as they walk past him think. He's been smoking for the last three years now, thank you very much. He's quite seasoned.

He sighs as he drops his cigarette and stamps it out with his coal colored shoe, the black laces swinging from side to side. He's had enough embarrassment for the day. Not that she'd even noticed. Ha, he was invisible to her. He didn't even exist in Serena van der Woodsen's perfect little world. Which was probably just as well, since Dan was far from perfect.

He closes his eyes and leans against the brick wall of his school building. It's sunny today. He hates the sun. It's so cheery, and **stupid**, and bright and it makes him nauseous. Can't it like rain or something? Or at least can it just be cloudy.

"Dan," a voice says waking him from his thoughts.

He cracks one dark colored eye open to find Vanessa standing in front of him, her pale arms crossed over her noticeably large chest. He likes Vanessa. She's refreshingly…devoid of designer clothing and girlish squeals. She wears a tight black tee shirt and dark jeans, her practically bald head shiny under the bright sun. She's a cool chick. He would probably be in love with her if he didn't have to go and be totally vain and fall in love with a goddess.

He opens his other eye. "Yes," he answers lazily.

"Did you watch that documentary over homeless people that I made yet?"

"Not yet," he answers, tugging at his blood red tie. It's so hot out here.

"Damn it, Dan, it's been week? What have you been doing? I need to know what you think of it."

_I've been drinking way too much coffee, writing lame poetry about my sister's fascination with her body, and imagining what it would be like to have sex with Serena van der Woodsen. _"Rufus and I have been cleaning out the bookcases," he lies, running a hand through his raggedy brown hair. "I'll watch it this afternoon, swear."

"Good," Vanessa says satisfied. "Catch you later," she says giving his tie a tug and walking away, her Doc Martens squeaking against the cobblestone pathway.

He lets his eyes linger on Vanessa as she walks away and then closes them again. She sort of walks sexy he supposes. Maybe if she had hair…

Nah, he'd still be too fucking narcissistic. She'd never look like Serena.

The bell goes off announcing school has begun and the tune is happy and lighthearted. As if they were all so excited to skip into the school and take a seat in those huge dark wooden chairs and listen to lectures about how fascinating the life span of an iguana is.

His eyes pop open to find Chuck Bass standing in front of him. He's wearing a naughty smile and that ridiculous scarf he always wears, no matter the weather. The only good thing about Chuck Bass standing in front of him is he is blocking the sun. Unfortunately the list stops there.

"So, Daniel, is it?"

Why the fuck is Bass talking to him? He stares at him blankly.

"Dan," he states, through his teeth. He hates that **name**.

"Bitter, are we? _Daniel._"

"What do you want, Bass?"

"Ah, so you know me."

"Unfortunately."

"So frank," he says with a grin. "I'm trying to make an effort here, Daniel," he says faux sincerely.

"What. Do. You. Want?"

"All right, all right. I'll cut to the chase."

"Finally."

Chuck pauses to grin evilly and continues. "So you like her, huh?"

"Who? Vanessa. No. She's my friend."

"Oh is that the chubby bald one," he says. "No, not her… the other."

"Who's _the other_?"

"I think we _both_ know who the other is, Daniel."

"No, I believe, I don't."

"Why so secretive Daniel? I know your secret. You love her. You love Serena van der Woodsen. Don't you?" Chuck asks, smirking with the joy of dispelling Dan's hidden affection. Guess, not as hidden as he thought it was.

"Serena," Dan sputters awkwardly. "As if, Bass."

"Oh, Daniel. Daniel, Daniel, Daniel. Don't deny it. I know I'm right. You sit here every day before school and you watch her. You enjoy the way she looks. It's ok, Daniel. Everyone does. Everyone stares at her in that short, short skirt," Chuck says as he cocks his head to peek over at her, licking his lips sleazily.

"A shame they're required to wear tights. There even more delicious bare," Chuck says with a lustful smile.

"Never mind that, Daniel," Chuck says mysteriously. "Just thought I'd chat for a second. Broaden my horizons. I don't usually converse with scrawny emo children, if you haven't noticed."

Dan just stands there. At a loss for witty comebacks that would sting. He's too… tired.

"Have a nice day, Daniel," Chuck says with a wink and turns around, his scarf fluttering around in the breeze.

The second bell rings, this one long, low, and yet still… cheery. Shit. He's officially late for homeroom. But hey, isn't it Professor Collins that told him he had a remarkable complexion? Maybe if Dan gives him a flirtatious smile he'll let it slide.


	2. Happy

**Citrus**

One smile and Dan is off scot-free. Well, he really is flattered that at least some people find him attractive. Even if they are sixty year old men.

.o.

Dan sits in his last class, pondering why Chuck Bass had talked to him this morning. I mean, how random had that been? Chuck never talks to him. Ever. He only flings insults about how he must be gay because he's never had a girlfriend and how ugly he is. Shit like that.

Now while the conversation this morning hadn't been exactly pleasant, it had been long, long and small talkish. As if he was actually interested in whether Dan was in love with Serena or not. Why the hell had he wanted to know how he felt about her?

Dan shakes his head. He hates Chuck Bass. He really does. He's seriously like number three on his people-I-think-about-murdering list.

Number _one_ sits right in front of him. Nathaniel Archibald. The ridiculously good-looking, dumb blonde jock that thinks he's all deeply troubled and shit. Like he doesn't sleep on a zillion thread count sheets every night on a four-poster bed in some fancy shmancy mansion. He doesn't even do his own fucking laundry for god's sake. The kid has it made. He should be the **happiest** kid on the planet.

And yet he sits around brooding and looking all sad and forlorn and getting messed up and high all the time. Like he has so many problems that he can't live his life for real. Like he has to be on something to get through the day. Seriously he is so fake.

And even besides the fact that he's gorgeous and rich, which how could he not be deliriously **happy** with being that, he still wallows around like some girl who's just gotten dumped while he's best friends with two of the most sought after girls on the Upper East side. One of those girls is number two on his list, Blair Waldorf. That girl is such a bitch. And the other is Serena. Serena fucking van der Woodsen.

And that's why he hates him the most. Because how could be go around looking so sad, when he spends countless hours frolicking around the city with _her_ by his side. I mean sure, Dan would probably commit suicide if he had to spend time with Blair. But Serena? How could he be anything but like so fucking **happy** being with her?

And then thinking this, Dan just gets even angrier. Cause you know what? He's probably been with her before. Like in that way. They've probably kissed, and made out, and seen each other naked. They've probably had sex before. And after he's done all that the guy is still depressed.

It really blows his freaking mind.

Dan clenches his fists under his desk and watches the clock. _Five. Four. Three. Two. One._

The bell rings and even though its all uplifting and merry, Dan doesn't mind because he's never **happier** than when that stupid bell rings at 3:45.

He relaxes his hands and briefly lets himself smile as he throws off his tie and shoves it in his bag.

He returns back to his blank and gloomy expression and watches Nate walk out the door, with his sad blue puppy dog eyes and the corners of his lips turned down in a frown. Dan wants to smack his face silly and yell at him about how frigging **happy** he should be. But he doesn't. Because he really wants to get the hell out of here come nine months from now. And he wants to be able to get into a decent college and not have _beat up a kid_ written on his permanent record.

Besides, does he even know how to fight? He's never hit anyone before. He's never been violent towards anyone. Dan thinks about this and concludes that he's probably pissed off enough to beat the shit out of him fairly decently. Not that he will, but it's sort of nice to think about.

He walks down the halls and out of the doors and sighs with relief. School is over. Finally. He slumps back up against the wall and watches Serena and Blair skip down the steps towards Nate, the lucky little bastard, like he does every day.

Blair throws her arms around Nate and kisses his cheek and starts chattering at a mile a minute about nonsensical things most likely, smoothing down his hair and fiddling with his coat buttons. He barely smiles, but Blair's smile is so wide and glossy red, it looks painted on.

Serena merely gives him a small smile, Dan can tell by the way her lips move that she says "Natie", and then she just ruffles his hair. And he grins. He bares his teeth and the corners of his mouth turn up and he grins.

And Dan feels sick to his stomach. Because, Nate likes Serena. He likes her a lot. She's the only one who can make him smile. The only one.

He sees Blair's eyes flick back and forth between them. He notices how Blair's hands quit touching Nate, how they fold across her chest and the way her mouth closes, how tight it seems now, how unshiny it's become. She's upset. She knows that she can never give Nate what Serena gives him. She can never make him **happy**. She could do anything in the world and he wouldn't crack a smile, but all Serena has to do is _be_ and Nate is **happy**.

And Dan almost feels sorry for her. Because that has to be one hell of a love triangle she's in. And the outcome just doesn't look good for Blair. And that means that it doesn't look good for him. Not that it ever looked good. Seeing as she doesn't even know him and all.

Dan sighs. He can't watch this anymore. It's really just too terrible.

Dan lights a cigarette with trembling fingers and takes long drags as if the stupid thing is helping him breathe. He lifts himself up off the wall and walks to the bus, leaving a smiling Nate and Serena and a frowning Blair behind him.

And little does he know, he leaves a smiling, **happy**-looking Chuck behind as well.


	3. Chuck! Vulnerable!

**----**

**Citrus**

**----**

Dan takes long strides towards the place he calls home, so ancient and crumbling it looks as if no one has lived there for fifty years. It looks like that on the inside too since, unfortunately no one in the Humphrey family knows how to tidy up.

Dan sighs as he takes the old bronze key from behind the loose brick and unlocks the door.

"DAN!" Jennifer Humphrey screams as the door clicks shut. "Dan! Is that you?"

"Yes, Jen," Dan grumbles, annoyed, yet there's a hint of affection in his voice. With their mother absent from their lives and their father so enraptured in his poetry and various hobbies, Dan and Jenny are all the other has.

Bouncing down the staircase in a shirt that make her breasts look even larger than usual and jeans that make her short legs look even stubbier, Jenny races towards Dan, throwing her arms around him in a hug.

"Dan, you'll never guess what happened today?" she cries, excitedly, large brown eyes shining.

"What?" Dan answers good-naturedly. He could really care less about what idiotic thing had happened in his sister's ninth grade life, but he couldn't bear to see her frown if he dismissed her. Dan had unfortunately turned into Jenny's mother/brother. And Dan wasn't very helpful when it came to what dress went with what shoes or which nail polish was in style. He had tried to give Vanessa that job, but she seemed to know even less about all things womanly than Dan did. And Vanessa _was_ a woman. Thoughts creep into Dan's head that if he were with Serena, she would be able to take care of all those things for Jenny. Another fantastical reason to add to the why-Serena-is-fucking-brilliant list.

"I heard something really interesting about Serena van der Woodsen," she squeals just waiting for Dan to birth a cow.

"Oh really," Dan replies coolly, as if Serena has managed to slip his mind. Which never happens.

Jenny pouts a little, upset that Dan isn't kissing her chubby cheeks with gratitude at her mysterious revelation.

"Mhmmm," Jenny mumbles, twirling around girlishly. "I heard that she's having this huge blowout this weekend. Her parents are gonna be out of town and she's throwing a party with her brother Eric who's back from college for the weekend."

"Oh," Dan says, grabbing some coffee mix and fixing himself a cup. "Sounds nice."

Jenny stares at him appalled. " 'Oh' 'Sounds nice'. Are you serious? That's all you're gonna say!"

"Jen," Dan sighs sipping his coffee even though it's burning his tongue. "I appreciate the info. But it's really not like I could ever go."

Jenny opens her mouth as if to speak, but is interrupted by a knocking at the door.

Jenny sashays over to the window and peers through the dusty, plum-colored curtains. Her eyes widen. Oh no.

Is it Serena? No, it couldn't possible be Serena. Well, maybe. Does she know anyone in Brooklyn? What a stupid question, of course she doesn't. But maybe… Oh shut up!

"What is it?" Dan questions, breathlessly, feeling slightly nauseous. He gingerly places his coffee mug down on the old wooden counter and takes small, quick steps towards Jenny.

"A limo!" Jenny says with astonishment, her voice swimming with confusion and disbelief.

"What?" Dan feels as if his coffee is going to come shooting back out of his throat. Would it still be hot?

More knocking comes from the door and Dan jumps. Racing over to the door, he yanks it open.

What the fuck?

It's **Chuck!**

--

"Wh-what are you…?" Dan spits out, stumbling over his words.

"I can't believe you don't have a doorbell!" Chuck exclaims as he invites himself in, his shiny shoes gliding against the ancient wooden floors. "And wow," Chuck says, his eyes scanning the place briefly before resting his eyes on Jenny. "And who is this?"

"My sister, Jenny," Dan says irritated. Jenny throws Chuck a sweet smile and he grins back devilishly.

"Pleasure," Chuck says sauntering up to Jenny and kissing her hand, causing her to giggle.

Dan rolls his eyes. "Why are you here?"

Chuck turns around to face Dan as if he forgot he was even there.

"Oh, right. Down to business," Chuck says with a dashing smile. "I came to invite you to Serena's soiree tomorrow evening. Should be fabulous."

Dan's mouth threatens to drop, but he holds his jaw tight and says calmly. "But why Chuck?"

Chuck frowns for a second and then his face brightens as if he was not supposed to be sad, as if this were all an act. "You'll see," he answers, his voice bittersweet and **vulnerable**. Recovering, he adds sleazily, "Your sister is welcome to attend as well."

Behind them, Jenny claps her hands and jumps up and down in a fit of pure joy and dashes up the stairs, exclaiming about finding something to wear.

Chuck grins and places his manicured hand on the brass doorknob. "Oh, but Daniel. Can we make one thing clear? You are there for Serena and Serena only. Understood."

"I'll talk to whomever I please," Dan says boldly.

Chuck sighs, almost defeated. "Fine, chat with whomever, I don't care. Just remember Serena ok?"

"Ok," Dan repeats, puzzled.

"Good afternoon, Daniel," Chuck says formally as he exits the door.

Dan walks over to the window without saying goodbye and watches as Chuck's scarf flutters in the breeze before ducking into the long dark limo and driving off.

What did Chuck want from him? And why did he want him to focus on Serena? This all made absolutely no sense. Dan had always thought Chuck wanted Serena, but maybe not.

Dan scratches his head thoughtfully and turns back into the kitchen to collect his coffee cup. Taking a sip, Dan is pleased to see that the temperature is just right.

Suddenly feeling very exhausted both emotionally and physically, Dan walks into his bedroom and slips Vanessa's documentary tape into the VCR player.

Just as he settles onto the floor in front of his small black and white television, a dirty looking man screams "She's trying to kill me!!!!!"

Startled, Dan spills his coffee all over his trousers.

"Vanessa," he hisses angrily.


	4. Dan Is Just A Tad Nervous

**Citrus**

Friday is the longest school day of Dan's life. He dawdles through the day, feeling more consumed by his thoughts than usual. All he can think about is Serena, and the party, and unfortunately Chuck.

_You are there for Serena and Serena only. _This one line runs through his head over and over again in Chuck's annoyingly haughty voice.

"I'm going to that _party_," he announces to Vanessa as she approaches him after school outside of St. Jude's.

"You mean that Serena chick's party?" Vanessa asks, her voice thick with disgust.

Dan nods, his chin hitting his stiff white collar each time his head bobs down. "Jenny too."

"Well that doesn't surprise me, but you? Seriously **Dan**? Could the obsession go any deeper?"

Dan blushes slightly and he scowls. "You don't understand. I get it. But don't look at me like that, ok?"

"OK," Vanessa says leaning against the wall next to him. "Hell, I'll even go with you to this lame party. I don't have anything to do anyway. Ruby **is** out of town all weekend with the band and I'm supposed to stay with you so… guess that means I'm rubbing elbows with the rich and famous tonight."

"You never told me about that," Dan snaps throwing her an evil glare. "Thanks for the notice. Oh and by the way I watched your fucking documentary and managed to spill coffee all over my best cargos. So thanks for that too."

Vanessa smirks with obvious amusement. "Like you have a best _anything_. And good. I'm glad it freaked you out. That's what it's supposed to do. Mission accomplished."

Vanessa stares out into the distance and spots Serena. She looks back at Dan and follows his gaze back to the blonde bombshell. She chuckles and sighs. "We better get to the bus before we miss it."

Dan groans. "We. How it warms my heart to hear you say that."

"Oh stop being so fucking cynical."

.o.

Three hours later, Dan sits on the edge of his grey duvet covered bed in his small dusty bedroom. He has no idea what to wear.

Jenny bursts into his room, followed by Vanessa.

Dan takes in Jenny's hair. It's straight. And it looks so odd. And she's wearing a ridiculously short midnight blue dress. Well at least it doesn't show off her breasts, Dan thinks. He would rather have the attention fixated on her legs. They were more, well, they were smaller.

And then his eyes shift to Vanessa. Somehow Jenny's gotten her into a long flowing black dress. She's wearing tights though because she hasn't shaved in days. Dan just _knows _this. Her Doc Martens still engulf her large feet and Dan smiles a little because it sort of gives him a constant. Well that and her hair. Its not like Jenny could do anything with stubble.

"What do you think?" Vanessa asks jokingly, twirling around in a girlish manner, Jenny's fake diamond chandelier earrings shimmering and whacking the sides of her pale face.

"You look like a girl," Dan says somberly.

"O-kay," Vanessa says throwing him a funny look. "I guess I'll take that as a compliment. Not as if I was really fishing for any."

"What about me?" Jenny asks, pouting her pink glossed lips and batting her heavily lined eyes. "How do I look?"

"Great," Dan gulp-lies.

Jenny smiles and swirls from side to side.

Vanessa rolls her eyes. "What are you doing Dan? Are you even gonna change?"

Dan shakes his head no and eases himself up off the bed. He wobbles a little as he stands and Vanessa catches his arm.

"Are you all right?" she asks and she sounds very motherly to Dan.

"Yeah," he says, wiping the sweat off his forehead. "I'm just, uh, a bit nervous that's all."

"Oh, well don't be. Its **just** Serena."

"Exactly," Dan sighs. "Its just Serena."

.o.

Dan is cold, as he stands outside flanked by Jenny and Vanessa as they wait for a cab. His hair flutters in the breeze and gets in his eyes and he keeps pushing it away but it just won't stay away. He gives up and lets his skinny arms fall to his side. A gust of chilling wind blows and he wraps his arms around his chest, hugging himself.

He glances over at Vanessa who looks pretty warm, despite the fact that she's bald and in a strappy dress. How the hell is she not freezing? Is he simply imagining that it's cold? Is he going crazy?

He looks over at Jenny. And she's fine too. And he feels faint.

The cab finally pulls up in all of its filthy mustard yellow glory. And Dan is, for once, quite glad to see the shitty thing.

Dan dives towards the cab and yanks open the door sliding in first, apparently forgetting the whole ladies-first mantra. And it's still cold. Fuck.

Vanessa and Jenny slip in beside him. Well sweet Jesus. Finally. Did it take five hours to get in the damn cab?

"Close the door!" Dan whisper-screams at Jenny. Jenny appears confused but does as she's told.

But it doesn't help. And he's pissed.

Fidgeting uncomfortably, Dan looks up towards the cab driver as he hits the gas. He's wearing **a** blue baseball cap and has a fuzzy blonde mustache above his chapped upper lip.

"Hey, can you turn the heat on?" Dan asks in a trembling, desperate voice.

"It is on," the cabbie grumbles.

"Well can you crank it a **tad** higher?" Dan spits angrily.

Vanessa turns towards Dan and stares at him incredulously. "Dan, what the hell is wrong with you? It's like a fucking oven in here. You need to ca-alm do-own," she says slowly as if he's some sort of idiot who can't comprehend what she's saying.

"I realize that," he shrills, curling up in a ball and leaning his head against Vanessa's bare shoulder.

"There you go, little guy. Fetal position always helps," Vanessa quips, rolling her eyes at Dan's little mental breakdown. Little is a bit of an understatement. Bit is a bit of an understatement.

"Oh shut up," Dan snarls, letting his head fall into Vanessa's silky black-sheathed lap.

The cab pulls up to Serena van der Woodsen's building. Jenny must have fed the address to the freaky-blonde-mustache-man, Dan thinks.

"Pull yourself together," Vanessa says, scootching over, causing Dan's head to hit the worn brown leather cushioned seat.

"Ufff," he says into the sticky material. He slowly raises his head up and suddenly realizes the meter is still running. Damn all things New York.

Scrambling into sitting position, he forks over some cash and leaps out of the car, slamming the door shut with his foot. Cause, he feels like it.

"Do _I _look ok?" Dan asks self consciously, loosening his black tie a little bit more with his glowing white hands.

"Seriously?" Vanessa asks, running a hand over her stubby head.

"Well everyone else asked it. Am I not allowed to or something?" Dan complains.

"Dan you look so fuckable. I'm ready to rip that sexy white shirt right off your smoking hot bod," Vanessa deadpans, raising her eyebrows in a kinky manner.

Dan's face colors and Jenny, looking sick, waves her hand in an exiting manner and skips into the building, calling, "See you guys later."

"Daniel Bernard Humphrey if you do not stop this **nervous** behavior right this minute I am taking you far far away to a little place I like to call…"

"Anywhere but that freaky film festival place!" Dan moans. "Ok, I'll stop, I'll stop." Vanessa smiles and loops her arm through Dan's sweaty arm, leading him to the golden double doors. "I would rather you pick Francesca's but at least your conquering your fear of all things blonde and leggy."

.o.

Just to make things clear, all the Vanessa/Dan banter is totally harmless friend stuff. This fic is Dan and Serena all the way. Even though I do _like_ Dan and Vanessa.

Thanks for reading!

Reviews are appreciated!


	5. StandUpDon'tFaintGetRomanticRemainAloof

**Citrus**

Vanessa swings the door open and walks towards the receptionist, dragging Dan along with her like a child who desperately wants to be freed from her grasp.

"Could you direct me to the Van der Woodsen's suite?" Vanessa asks trying not to roll her eyes at the sound of that horrifically posh sounding question shooting out of her red lipstick covered mouth.

"Or to the nearest restroom before I puke," Dan says in a high-pitched squeal, half jokingly. His death grip hold on Vanessa's arm is the only thing keeping him afloat.

Vanessa ignores Dan as the receptionist with rhinestone covered glasses directs her to the elevator, "Room 1773" rolling off her tongue in a formal fashion.

Once the golden elevator door slides shut, Dan slides slowly down the wall, collapsing on the carpeted floor.

"Dan, buddy, old pal. You might want to get off the floor before…"

The door slides open. Right inside of the Van der Woodsen's suite and suddenly everyone is staring at the boy who sits nauseously on the floor of the elevator, eyes wide and face red.

.o.

"**Stand up**, Dan!" Vanessa hisses aggressively and Dan jolts back to reality. Hopping off the floor he allows Vanessa to ease him out of the elevator and into the suite overflowing with people.

"Ooh La La" by Goldfrapp pumps at an eardrum defying volume throughout the room as Dan looks around the apartment at all the sophisticated Upper East Siders in party mode.

Blair. Sits on a dark chocolate colored high-backed leather chair. Long tresses straight and sleek thrown back in a low ponytail. She wears a white blouse with a paisley scarf and red tights under plaid shorts. Black leather ankle boots engulf her small narrow feet. Her eyes stare off into space, a bored-to-death expression on her china doll face.

Nate. Leans against the patterned wallpaper. His hair is messy and a tad wet and it hangs in his eyes. He desperately needs a haircut. He wears a wrinkled dress shirt and his school cargos with his lacrosse sneakers. An orange tie winds loosely around his neck.

And then he spots her. Serena. Lying on top of the kitchen counter. Her long blonde hair is wavy and courses down her back, thick and voluminous. Her blue eyes are closed and her lashes fan out across her rosy cheeks. She wears a Brown sweatshirt over what appears to be a violet chiffon minidress, yellow tights, and black pumps. A purple butterfly clip holds back a few strands of her hair. Her head rests in the lap of a golden haired boy who looks a few years older than her. He strokes her hair with ease, his eyes closed as well, his head bobbing slightly to the pounding music He wears a white polo shirt with an expensive looking watch on his wrist and chocolate colored dress pants with a tan belt. Dan wonders who the lucky boy is.

He doesn't see Jenny, but he isn't too worried about her. Quite frankly he's more worried about everything else. Gosh, he sounds like such a god-awful brother, but really this was a big night for Dan and for once he couldn't be worrying about his naive little sister.

And then he finds Chuck. He stands near the French doors that lead out to the balcony. His hair is in its usual mussed fashion and he wears the same stupid scarf over a blood red suit and white dress shirt and shoes.

Man all of these people dress insanely strange, Dan thinks as he stands dumbfounded next to Vanessa.

Soon enough Chuck spots him and crooks a finger at him, ushering him to come forward, his eyes warning, telling him not to attract attention.

Dan sighs a shaky breath. Chuck. What the hell did he want him to do? It looked like Serena was already cozy with another guy. What the fuck did he need him to do?

"I'll be right back," Dan whispers to Vanessa.

She shrugs. "All right. **Don't faint** or anything while I'm not with you."

Dan rolls his eyes as he watches her head to the bar.

.o.

"So what's the deal Chuck? What do you want me to do?" Dan asks, a tad exhaustingly as he and Chuck stand out on the balcony. It's a cool night and the breeze whips around Dan making him feel as cold as he did just minutes before on the cab ride to the very spot he is standing now.

"Just go find Serena. Distract her. Whisk her away. **Get romantic**. I know you can do it, Daniel. I've seen you writing all those ridiculously angsty, tragic love poems. Or sonnets. Whatever you like to call them," Chuck says wearily as if the entire idea of the evening ahead is tiring him.

Dan merely nods, suspecting more is to come out of Chuck's mouth. It does.

"Don't be overly romantic though. Or infatuated as you tend to do. **Remain aloof** as if she doesn't really interest you. Serena doesn't like to be fawned over. That turns her off. She doesn't want someone to come up to her and tell her how beautiful and wonderful she is. She already knows how fantastic she is. She doesn't need to hear it a thousand times a day," Chuck goes on with a bored tone as if everyone should already be properly educated on the ways to Serena's heart.

"Mention underground, different things about yourself. I'm sure you have plenty of that. Talk about music that's not _in_, old books and films. Off kilter aspects of your life. Don't talk about normal things like going yachting or playing badminton. Not that you do those sorts of things which makes you completely and utterly perfect for this task."

"And what is this task?" Dan asks. I mean not that he truly minds trying to win over Serena, but he still wants to know how this has anything to do with Chuck.

"Is it really necessary for you to know?" Chuck asks, staring off into the night, his eyes flickering over the brightly lit buildings.

"Yes," Dan says quickly, hoping Chuck just fucking tells him already. He almost wants to refuse to go along with the plan if he won't tell him, but he'd really just be an idiot if he turned down the chance to talk to Serena.

I mean he really had to go along with Chuck's little arrangement. Cause really, without Chuck egging him to do so, Dan probably wouldn't have enough courage to speak with her. She was like this creature he had always dreamed and hoped he would talk to and now that he was finally going to it still seemed impossible, like it would never happen. But it was going to. It was.

"That was rhetorical," Chuck answers smugly as he graces Dan with a sad smirk and a sweeping exit, leaving Dan on the balcony, still trying to wrap his head around the fact that he was going to talk to Serena. Fucking. Van. Der. Woodsen.

.o.

Oh for his own sake, get the boy a scotch on the rocks.

.o.

I know these chapters are short and for that I am truly sorry, but I do hope the content is satisfying.

Thanks to all who are reading. I appreciate it immensely. And to those who review. I appreciate is even more immensely.


End file.
